by Kristine Lewis
It was a beautiful Fall morning in Michigan. If you’re from the Midwest or Northeast, you know what I am talking about. There is a crispness in the air, and the leaves are beginning to change into their brilliant colors.
I was watching my six year old son’s soccer game….my favorite Fall activity! My son’s team was undefeated so far this season. In fact, the teams he has played on over the last three years have never lost a game.
My son was not among the players that went in the first quarter. The opposing team proved to be a worthy opponent as the balled was kicked back and forth down the field with no goals scored by either team.
I thought for sure our team would pull ahead in the next quarter as some of the stronger members of the team would be in that group. To my dismay, our team (my son among them) played very poorly in the second quarter. They seemed to be almost sleep-walking…playing with absolutely no passion.
Since my son usually gave soccer his all, I was a little disappointed in his efforts. Yes, I am a competitive soccer mom! We were down two points at the end of this quarter. I wondered if this would be my son’s first experience with defeat.
While I was watching his game and all the players, life suddenly made sense. You see I often struggled with how to achieve the success I so desperately desired. Now I could see why people get ahead in business, in relationships, in sports…in life, and why some get left behind, and why some get seriously defeated in the game of life. It seemed so obvious as I watched the game unfold.
There were three types of players that day as there are in life. The first type of player is the one that doesn’t even bother to try. Whether they lack passion for what they are doing, don’t believe in their own abilities or are too weighed down by fear and their own sense of inadequacy, they never really join the game.
This player might be out there going through the motions, pretending to play, but they are not really engaged in the sport physically, mentally or emotionally. This is the player who only kicks the ball when it is right in front of their feet. They don’t have a vision or a plan for where the ball will go once they attempt to kick. And, they never bother to follow it up or chase it down.
A beautiful little girl on my son’s team exemplified the second type of player. She was fast. She was strong. She clearly possessed the ability. You could even see a glimmer of passion in her from time to time. Yet, she always seemed to run next to the ball. She would follow the opposition all the way down the field but never really give it that extra push to attempt to steal the ball away from the opposition or score a goal.
In the past, I could relate most to this type of player. I knew what to do to succeed. I had the ability. And, I had the passion…most of the time, unless the going got really hard. Then, my passion seemed to wane. I seemed all too willing to give up and go after a new “dream”, thus never achieving my goals.
When my son came out after the second quarter, I pulled him aside to give him the requisite pep talk. I told him he definitely wasn’t playing his best and wasn’t being his usual aggressive self. More importantly though, I told him he was entitled to that ball as much as anyone else and to go after the ball like he owned it.
He seemed to rally in the 3rd quarter. In fact, he scored two goals. With goals scored by his other team members during that quarter, his team passed the other team by.
Just to tell you a little more about my son…yes, he possesses the ability and the know-how for the game. However, he is also the smallest and youngest player on the team which could certainly put him at a disadvantage…yet it rarely does. When he is on the field, he is filled with passion and enthusiasm. It is simply a sight to see!
He is a player number three. He is aggressive. He won’t back down to players that are almost twice as big as him. He gets up when he falls down. He stays with that ball as long as he possibly he can. When he kicks the ball, he visualizes where he wants the ball to go and has a plan for it.
Every goal scored for his team is a celebration. And, every goal scored against his team is an opportunity to learn. He utilizes his team to achieve his goals and knows when to pass off to other players for the better of the team (or at least as well as any 6-year old can.) He knows that he has the same right to that ball as everyone else.
His team won 6-2 that day. What I thought could be his first taste of defeat was instead a wonderful eye-opening experiencing for me. I now know that to be successful, I must be a player number three. I need to stick with my goals with a vengeance even when things get tough, or I feel like the smallest person in the world.
Like my son’s game exemplified, sometimes when things are really tough, victory is just a little extra effort away. I now understand that I must visualize where I want to go and have a plan. And, when I experience success, I must celebrate! And, of course use my defeats to learn.
I must play the game with the same amount of passion and tenacity that my son plays with on the field. I know now that I have the same right to success as everyone else. That ball is mine! And, that ball can be yours.
It was a beautiful Fall morning in Michigan. If you’re from the Midwest or Northeast, you know what I am talking about. There is a crispness in the air, and the leaves are beginning to change into their brilliant colors.
I was watching my six year old son’s soccer game….my favorite Fall activity! My son’s team was undefeated so far this season. In fact, the teams he has played on over the last three years have never lost a game.
My son was not among the players that went in the first quarter. The opposing team proved to be a worthy opponent as the balled was kicked back and forth down the field with no goals scored by either team.
I thought for sure our team would pull ahead in the next quarter as some of the stronger members of the team would be in that group. To my dismay, our team (my son among them) played very poorly in the second quarter. They seemed to be almost sleep-walking…playing with absolutely no passion.
Since my son usually gave soccer his all, I was a little disappointed in his efforts. Yes, I am a competitive soccer mom! We were down two points at the end of this quarter. I wondered if this would be my son’s first experience with defeat.
While I was watching his game and all the players, life suddenly made sense. You see I often struggled with how to achieve the success I so desperately desired. Now I could see why people get ahead in business, in relationships, in sports…in life, and why some get left behind, and why some get seriously defeated in the game of life. It seemed so obvious as I watched the game unfold.
There were three types of players that day as there are in life. The first type of player is the one that doesn’t even bother to try. Whether they lack passion for what they are doing, don’t believe in their own abilities or are too weighed down by fear and their own sense of inadequacy, they never really join the game.
This player might be out there going through the motions, pretending to play, but they are not really engaged in the sport physically, mentally or emotionally. This is the player who only kicks the ball when it is right in front of their feet. They don’t have a vision or a plan for where the ball will go once they attempt to kick. And, they never bother to follow it up or chase it down.
A beautiful little girl on my son’s team exemplified the second type of player. She was fast. She was strong. She clearly possessed the ability. You could even see a glimmer of passion in her from time to time. Yet, she always seemed to run next to the ball. She would follow the opposition all the way down the field but never really give it that extra push to attempt to steal the ball away from the opposition or score a goal.
In the past, I could relate most to this type of player. I knew what to do to succeed. I had the ability. And, I had the passion…most of the time, unless the going got really hard. Then, my passion seemed to wane. I seemed all too willing to give up and go after a new “dream”, thus never achieving my goals.
When my son came out after the second quarter, I pulled him aside to give him the requisite pep talk. I told him he definitely wasn’t playing his best and wasn’t being his usual aggressive self. More importantly though, I told him he was entitled to that ball as much as anyone else and to go after the ball like he owned it.
He seemed to rally in the 3rd quarter. In fact, he scored two goals. With goals scored by his other team members during that quarter, his team passed the other team by.
Just to tell you a little more about my son…yes, he possesses the ability and the know-how for the game. However, he is also the smallest and youngest player on the team which could certainly put him at a disadvantage…yet it rarely does. When he is on the field, he is filled with passion and enthusiasm. It is simply a sight to see!
He is a player number three. He is aggressive. He won’t back down to players that are almost twice as big as him. He gets up when he falls down. He stays with that ball as long as he possibly he can. When he kicks the ball, he visualizes where he wants the ball to go and has a plan for it.
Every goal scored for his team is a celebration. And, every goal scored against his team is an opportunity to learn. He utilizes his team to achieve his goals and knows when to pass off to other players for the better of the team (or at least as well as any 6-year old can.) He knows that he has the same right to that ball as everyone else.
His team won 6-2 that day. What I thought could be his first taste of defeat was instead a wonderful eye-opening experiencing for me. I now know that to be successful, I must be a player number three. I need to stick with my goals with a vengeance even when things get tough, or I feel like the smallest person in the world.
Like my son’s game exemplified, sometimes when things are really tough, victory is just a little extra effort away. I now understand that I must visualize where I want to go and have a plan. And, when I experience success, I must celebrate! And, of course use my defeats to learn.
I must play the game with the same amount of passion and tenacity that my son plays with on the field. I know now that I have the same right to success as everyone else. That ball is mine! And, that ball can be yours.
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